It's probably time

I cling to everything that is old and that I've built. I started this when 15 and silly. I'll be turning 21 this year. But this blog has been quiet for awhile, has been silent for months and I feel no need to communicate through it anymore. I need to learn to let go of things, things that carry memories but do not create. I need to stop waiting, and waiting for a response of relief. Because waiting is tiring and I tire easily. This blog has served as a place for me to express my feelings every bit of it, but I don't do that anymore. Because I  have found another haven for me to do it. I tried as hard as I can to keep you, but you didn't, so adios, sorry if my heart is cool towards you.

New Year, New Challenges.

I loved you then, and I love you now.Don't wave no goodbye.

It's amazing how two years had past and yet the same song still plays. Well two years had past and yet I remain stagnant as the water in a well. I feel disconnected, and it's my fault I know. I am the one who's too lazy to say hi, how is it going? I am the one who doesn't try, because trying takes a lot of effort and effort takes energy. Right now, my energy is nowhere near where it was last two years ago. It's a the level where I wish to sit in the cubicle which I call my room all day. Days had past with me spending all of it inside these four white walls. Some might say I'm wasting my life away, well....indeed I am. I am a prisoner of my own sanctuary.


Good morning, and in case I don't see you, good afternoon, good evening and good night.

You and you alone

Don't depend on people.

I was stupid enough to do so.

Two lessons in one week.

Trust God. Thanks for showing me that I only need You. 

I lost my head in San Francisco

The thing is, I miss you terribly.

I don't show it because my ego won't let me. What if you don't feel the same way.

I trick myself by saying that I don't care,

but there's no fooling anyone,

I miss you and I want you to miss me too.

And we talk less and less,

I wanted to tell you things,

but it always seem like you don't care enough

so why should I talk to a heart that does not feel enough

I'm getting used to it,

The weeks that goes by,

What if I really stop caring,

I don't want to,

But it's too painful.

Sorry for the hostility

I don't mean to,
I just want home, I want familiarity.

I want to be where I belong.

I see you're doing fine without me, but I want you to miss me.

#I really need to start blogging again. To start a new blog? Or not to start a new blog?

In the end I am still that 15 year old girl

I might be older, my eye-bags are up to a point of no return to a well rested face. Teens were criticized to be unpredictable, impulsive and naive. Luckily for my parents, I'm a chicken, I was predictable, maybe boring. I hate risk, ( I would be a horrible entrepreneur) I grew up being taught that, risks that involved consequences are bad and you should stay away. And so I did.

I plan to continue this, my heart is much more safer.

Insanity

It was a Thursday last year,
You bought Panda,
I ate a bagel.

Today is the Monday of the new year,
I bought a bagel and you ate Panda,
And that is how it goes.